TiNi...24, educator, emotional freak, crybaby, a Giver, Daughter, Sis, Gerlfren, Bestfren, Pendidik, Muslimah.. mind's on work and the kids most of the time, hard core emotional, loves to love, bad stress dealer, trying hard to 'un-neglect' the neglected, learning hard to be strong, loving those who deserve to be loved most.....
10/31/2004

yesterday, was quite a hectic day.....

me n my luvable cutie pie mak (heehee!) went to SIR building (or do u call it ICA building) to get our passports. ok, ceritanya begini....we sent our pics via post oredi BUT kena reject (sedih sey...) for my mom, her tudung's colour is too bright n for me plak..biasa lah, muz see the whole face, cannot have part of my pipi hidden or my eyes hidden...(so siti, kalau nak tukar passport tu...selamat lah kau..KHAKHA! )

so me n my mom took instant passport pics rite before we went....



Okie, notice the difference in my usual way of wearing the tudung. I was satisfied wif the way i looked and thot dat it wasnt dat bad after all. But.....after taking our Q no, waited a while to see the officer, i was told "Sori eh dik, gambar ni tak bole...nak kena nampak pipi..." KENA NAMPAK PIPI!!!??? my pipi is the same like other pples' pipi per......

So i was told to go to a nearby room where they had a few booths for picture taking. I was reminded to pull back my tudung..kata kakak tu," Tgk macam mak adik punya tudung...macam gitu bole..." So i had to....juz look at the difference...dun u get reminded of my 16 yr old image...HAHAHA!



OK....STOP LAFFING!!! so dats my new look for my new passport....BINGITZ!!

Aniwae, tink i mentioned about having a new set of sofa for the Encik Hassan living room. Well, for very obvious reasons, we gota give away the old set. So my abang and a fren came over in the afternoon and took them away....

My abg n fren, wrapping up the glass on the coffee table....


The lorry dat took our sofa set away....


And off they went..........

Now....for the new set....nantikan gambar2 seterusnya....hehehe!!
Ciao pplez...


(me & my usual look.....i'm happy wif the way i look now, thank u.....)



Said TiNi at 10:17 AM

10/28/2004

I have in my hands right now....my new Nikon Coolpix 3200 digital camera...hehehehe!! Well, like all new cameras, i need to charge the batts for more than 8 hrs...so mebe tomoro i shall start my pic-taking spree.....wheee~~~~

okie, till tomoro peepz.....



Said TiNi at 9:14 PM

10/24/2004

one more week to school holidays...!!! at least tak payah tgk bebudak tu....hehe....

niwae, i gota wait for my camera. wait wait wait......

went to geylang tadi. hmm, nuthin special. macam gitu jugak. the guys in my family wearing YELLOW dis yr. hahaha...hmm, gez i will be wearing a light yellow kebaya too. my mom bought 2 jubahs at BEWA. haizz, macam malas gitu nak raya eh....hahaha!!

if u can tell, im so not in the mood to update...so till next time lah...

Ciaoz.


Said TiNi at 9:26 PM

10/23/2004

Hie Hie Hie.....heehee...(dun u tink i sound like a RIA deejay??)

Today is the day i am gettin my digicam. After so long waiting, today is the day. HEHE! lets juz hope it wont be a disappointment like my hp...i shall update again, mebe tonite, mebe tomoro...

Aniwae, after quite some time....yesterday era eventually joined our lepakking session at McCafe. tho semlm was quite a short session, but i tink i kinda enjoyed it..khekhe! it was cozy, raining outside...drinking mochaccino, eating rotiboy sejuk( BETTER if its hot...) n talking abt school (now era can comfortably join the conversation...*smilez*), our holiday destination (so far belum betol2 confm, mebe cherating cos ada yg nak swimming2)...hmmm, so far these are the 2 main topics...we shall have such a session again soon....

ok then, till next entry....daaa~~~~


Said TiNi at 11:19 AM

10/20/2004

Juz as i was about to relax a bit...since the term is about to end...i kena longgok dengan 1001 macam kerja2 yang can get abit redundant....

1) now dat we have finished marking, we are supposed to get down to lesson planning for next year. my school is embarking into a new system for the sec 1s, so since i am teaching the sec 1s next year (alongside another colleague) we gota come up wif FULL LESSON PLANS, together wif MATERIALS, WORKSHEETS and wat nots for the whole term....to be submitted to the VP by 17 nov...the rest of the teachers pon kena plan jugak, tapi the other levels less detailed and they have resources oredi, tinggal susun jer......

2) each department is given 2 classrooms and 1 IT lab...so we have to decorate n design our own rooms...so, sape agaknye yang kena buat tu sume??? well, i foresee my holiday gona be a real short one....there are tons of things to do...classrm arrangements, decorations, painting, bla bla bla...we gona get students to help, but we still gota be there rite....

3) ever heard of SEM? well, tadi was the FIRST time the criterion owners or simply the pple i/c met us, the newbies are myself n another colleague. truthfully, we noe nuts abt dis thing...then explain sikit2...terus tell us abt the things dat require us to scout for evidence. i dun mind all dat...if they were to tell us earlier, so at least i have time to at least understand wats really needede to be done. guess wen kita kena submit the evidences? FRIDAY laaa.....punya bingit...nasib baik puasa....tapi mmg aku ni penyabar orangnye....so die2 i juz do wat i can lah, fri kasi kan...cukup tak cukup i dun care, since u give me last minit like dis, dah lah aku nie baru, satu benda tak tahu. we're not even sure where to start to get the evidence sey........

OK,....so tak lah sampai 1001.....tapi, kita kan holiday..nak raya lagi....jangan harap lah raya ni nak hooray2....**sigh**

Oklah, cukup sampai di sini saja komplen2 saya pada hari ini....till next time...adioz!


Said TiNi at 3:17 PM

10/19/2004

I feel sad.

The song dat plays wenever i go to siti's blog...is such an all-time fav. SUmhow, listening to it, makes me recall all dat happened...everytin that has brought me to where i am rite now. From late sec...JC life...my so colourful NUS life (cuma the life didnt really revolve much around NUS itself)..NIE..and now, teaching and working...earning my own income right now...financially independent...24, turning 25...

So, why am i sad in the first place? entah eh...im not so sure myself. Mebe as i recall all the happenings, i begin to realise how much every single happenings, even hw trivial it may get...comes wif a reason. How hurtful things can get...how depressing...it is all a learning journey for me to learn from.. the heartaches i've felt, the hurt i've caused..at times wen i luk back, i've gone thru quite a lot juz to reach where i am right now.

But then again, the worst ive been thru may not even be bad for others. I gota be thankful...at least i am blessed wif loved ones around me, a sound and stable job, enough to eat, enough to wear, a roof above my head...the list goes on...

Again...why am i sad in the first place? i have made mistakes...major ones...worst thing is, some of it involves hurting others. Kepada insan-insan yang pernah dilukai, disakiti akibat perilaku, kata-kata atau perbuatan hamba yang hina ini, jutaan maaf dipinta. I am terribly sorry dat in the midst of building a life, finding a direction, discovering myself...i end up hurting...

so...anyone care to tell me why i'm sad in the first place?



Said TiNi at 11:18 PM

10/17/2004


How about dis one....? Hmmm....

Said TiNi at 10:57 PM




Dis is my target....lambatlah nak tunggu dia...tak sabar....

Said TiNi at 10:17 PM

10/14/2004

Selamat menyambut bulan penuh kemuliaan dan barakah, bulan Ramadhan...semoga segala amal dan ibadah yang kita kerjakan akan diterimaNya dan terus kita istiqamah di dalam landasan Islam yang sebenar.

Bulan penuh kemuliaan ini adalah masa bagi kita untuk renung kembali dan muhasabah diri kita sendiri....mensyukuri segala nikmat dan kemanisan yang kita rasai sepanjang hayat kita di bumi Allah yang sememangnya setakat pinjaman semata-mata....memohon keampunan dan penerimaan taubat kita yang sesungguhnya sentiasa leka dengan hal-hal keduniaan....

Ya Robb, kami memohon kepadaMu...tetapkanlah iman kami, terimalah solat dan amalan kami, ampunilah dosa-dosa kami yang terlalu banyak ini....
Ya Rahman, sempurnakanlah puasa kami, pandanglah kami dengan pandangan rahmatMu, kasihanilah kami yang sentiasa kalah dengan hawa nafsu, tetapkanlah kami di jalan yang Kau redhai dan matikanlah kami di dalam keimanan di akhir kalimah Laa Ilaha Illallah Muhammadur Rasullullah...
Ameen....
Take care dearies.....semoga ibadah puasa kali ini dapat dijalankan dengan sempurna...InsyaAllah...:)



Said TiNi at 11:29 PM

10/13/2004

so wat do u tink of yet another new outlook...lurrvvee it dis time....lurrvvee the 'blog-skin modifier' even more....heehee! okielah, not sweet, not like the first one...but i still like lah...:p
aniwae, juz to share my thots..... today i was in high spirits in the morning. Had a short discussion regarding the work review (my ceecher frenz shd noe...) I've had good comments n feedback from my HOD (Alhamdulillah, segala puji bagiNya) n u noe how it feels like wen u gota do a lot of werk and get appreciated or u noe dat it is gona help bring u sumwer... sumhow, becos i am doing quite a number of extra2 things, it helps me to be a li'l bit ahead than the other new teachers. She said she could see the difference in me since time practicum dulu ngan skarang as a full-fledged teacher. I was soooo glad, dat coming from my HOD. According to her, she sees the confidence in me and she actually mentioned during the ranking session dat she trusts me to be able to 'move forward' and carry more responsibilities. She said dat i've done a good job so far and that I shd be more exposed so dat my talents n capabilities can be recognised....
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAA!!!
after i typed all of dat out, suddenly it seems a bit overwhelming and pressurising....... hmmm.....truthfully, after hearing all dat, i feel so motivated to contribute as much as i can...but i juz hope i will be able to hold back a bit so as to avoid myself frm any burnouts n disappointments and most importantly, so dat the main intention n motivation of doing so is not becos of the recognition... i am thankful, sekurang2nya i was given the opportunity thru the dept's programmes... so boleh dikatakan, i had a good start to my teaching career... Alhamdulillah....
however, a few colleagues n myself had lunch outside tadi. the feeling of resentment, disappointment, anger, sadness....sampai mengalir air mata....haizz, it is hard wen 'orang-orang atas' failed to set the right culture among the staff and end up having a pool of teachers always there as 'orang-orang bawah', never recognised, never appreciated, kadang2 tak dipandang langsung pon...(literally ok!!)
so, there are 2 conflicting sides within myself. strive to be there, or stay to be here...with the rest...
Basically, i juz wanna do my best...fulfill my responsibilities....contribute....keep on learning....and prove to MYSELF, n not anybody else dat i CAN.... it wont be for others but myself and the Al-Mighty....
Pray dat i'll be strong.......


Said TiNi at 3:42 PM

10/11/2004


Dis is wat u get wen U're stuck In a Jam for over an Hour

Said TiNi at 11:47 PM



wat a weekend...

Well, first of all I didn't do much on both days ( in terms of werk la) Went for kenduri at my cuzin's new place at Punggol on Saturday. Dat was fun, all get togethers are fun. Heh! Biasalah, me n the rest of the gurls..lepaking...haizz, if only...if only i have a digicam to capture all those moments...damn!

Well, Sunday was a photo taking day...(haha!) cos he decided to bring his cam along wif us to JB. I was sooooo thankful he brought it along cos we spent most of our time in the car, stuck in the jam...pergi AND balik! pergi especially cos we were stuck for more than an hr....balik however wasnt dat bad cos we were taken into a sinful yet heavenly indulgence...*winkz* We bought 2 slices of cakes...oreo cheeze n classic cheeze from secret recipe...yumz!! the best way to deal wif the boredom of getting stuck in a traffic jam...plus all the picture taking...we gona go secret recipe each time we go jb n im gona try every single type of cake they have there....heehee!! murah you...RM$4.90 a piece...dats abt S$2.40.....murah kan!!!

So dats my weekend...plus an additional day...hehe! so tomoro i'm back to school, doin my invigilation...the most boringest thing to do in a classroom full of kids...so, till next time pplz...

Kalau kuasa nak tengok the pics we took in the car....
tengoklah!





Said TiNi at 10:28 PM

10/09/2004

Exam week is almost the same as a short break for teachers. Putting aside the tons of exam papers to mark la. At least tak payah plan lessons....kan kan kan....

ok, updates....
hmm....nuthing much la...really....

OOOO.....i went to the robinson's sale semlm at expo. I tell u, i can go CRAZY!! sumhow there are much much more good stuff, esp wen it comes to shoes n bags. Spent abt a hundred bucks, nasib baik da nak gaji...khekhe!! lemme see, wat did i buy.....
- a sling bag, one dat i always use time pat NUS dulu...the long strap, leathery.....:D
- a pair of white shoes...hehe...my mom kata, my shoes berkotak2....yelah, a pair will come wif a box wat...mestilah berkotak...;)
- a pair of pin-striped 'keje2' pants...i likeee.....
- a purple colour blouse...a bit keje2 oso....
- a pair of ear-studs....its the silver Paris Bijoux brand u always see at Isetan. $10 onleee.... the earstuds nye shape kan like the letter 'H'....

Phew....tapi tak lah banyak sangat eh..khehee..tak termasok wat my parents n Syukri get for themselves....ada bags, shoes, shirts, pants, brooches.....hehee...hmm, macam nak pegi lagi la......

OK, selain dari kegiatan membeli-belah tu (sooo cikgu2...) my markings juz came in yesterday. TO tink of it, since there are not as many Malay students, i dun tink mine is as bad as the other teachers. Aniwae, new teachers are given less papers to mark. So, ok lah jugak...im not stressed.

Hmm, apa lagi.....

Ooo...the new blogskin....well, u shd be expecting changes every couple of months...yang ni testing2 jer...hehe...watever it is, i will sure lurve every single one of it....*winks*

I've been thinking again.....Bila aku nak beli digicam ni!!!???? sigh........i hope i can get it be4 raya....i hope.....

OKlah, till next entry....adios pplez!



Said TiNi at 1:17 PM

10/05/2004

It is sad how some pple form first impressions and stick to it no matter wat. Dun we all deserve to be seen not only by dat few instances...?? Dun we all deserve to be treated wif respect, regardlessof age, race, pangkat,etc....
I feel sad wen students began hating their teachers....n i cant blame them for feeling dat way. Cmon, we all have been young before, they too have feelings. They may not noe how to channel the right feelings to the right places, but as teachers arent we supposed to guide, help and advise..not to create more anger, pin them down further, scold n humiliate....kalau aku pon aku marah!!! who to blame, who to correct the situation?
wat abt parents.....*sigh*



Said TiNi at 11:11 AM

10/03/2004

Api ini menyala
untuk menerangi
untuk berbakti memberi cahaya
tak mahu padam
tak akan padam
walau membakar diri
kerana takut dipinggirkan
kerana takut digantikan neon
kerana takut kehilangan
walau teman hanyalah kegelapan
kerana kegelapan inilah yang memerlukan cahaya
namun dalam kegelapan
yakin si diri
yang terus membakar
akan ada hikmah
akan ada nikmat
yang belum mahu menampakkan diri
walhal
kegelapan itu menakutkan
kerana tiada yang pasti di dalam kesuraman
namun
api ini akan terus menyala
kerana yakin ia akan masa yang menguji sabar
masa tidak akan menipu
masa akan menjanjikan semua
biar api ini menyala
selagi kegelapan masih ada....
selagi tiada neon atau pelita
untuk menggantikan api
yang setia
terus menyala...


Said TiNi at 8:52 PM



Yeayyy.....!!!
My laptop is well again....heehee! Thanx to BB dear.....:D

Hmm, feel like updating tapi tak tahu apa yg nak diupdatekan.....lemme see.....
Well, so far the past week has been ok.. not too bad. Preparing the kids for final year exam, latihan after latihan. Been telling myself, i'm not gonna stay in sch till late, unless if i have to. Kalau ada chance balik cepat jer, i will go home. No more stay in sch sampai hari da gelap.. cuma at times i do feel dat i need to stay so dat i get things done. Cos biasalah, once home, the bed will come alive...calling and seducing me....hahaha!! once my head is on my pillow, dats it...i can sleep for 3 whole hours....bis tu mlm tak leh tido....then the next day ngantok lagi....n it became a cycle...yada yada yada....hahahhaa!! (gilerrr.....)

It seems soooo fast and we are approaching Ramadhan again. the time to reflect and look back...*sigh* sometimes i feel like i've been 'away'...n i miss feeling dat settled calmness, dat engaging feeling towards the Almighty...its true dat at times the worldly things around u makes u forget and detached for a while...n it is sad also dat only in times of need then will u get closer to Him... my wish is for my life to be prolonged to meet Ramadhan cos i miss it...

Aniwae, wat do u guys tink of ranking among teachers??? I dunno...a few colleagues shared their views and personally i feel like its all a big game. All the heads will put forward their 'weapons' aka good teachers...then other heads will try to bring them down...if u have done sometin, make sure it is seen...cos if not, its as good as nuthin....BOLE GITU???? hmm, i agree dat u do need to be smart la so as to survive but wat happens to sincerity and keikhlasan in doing wat we have to do? haizz....i keep telling myself, watever dat i need to do...i shall be strong n bertahan for the sake of the amanah dat i am carrying, for the responsibility dat i have in nurturing these kids to become better people, so dat the money dat i get each month is hard-earned. So i answer only to Him....and not to the 'bosses'......
but at times, its hard to say oso lah...............*sigh*

OK lah, till next time....hopefully there will be pictures then.....to my fellow teacher-frenz, lets all do wat we are doing for the amanah dat we carry so dat we will not go crazy. HEHE!!!



Said TiNi at 1:10 AM

10/01/2004

I need to deal wif my INSECURITIES.

confident
positive
independent
strong
self-reliant
confident
believe
control
positive
chill
HAHA!!




Said TiNi at 3:34 PM

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